misc

25 % Off Everything In The Pharmacy!!

defcon — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 09:55:25 -0400

For a limited time only we here at DJX are having a major blow out, go nuts, your head will explode ...sale.With any items purchased through the Pharmacy type in the promotional code, aka the magic words: DJXSALE and 25 % will drop off the cost of your purchases.

Again this is for a limited time only, so we expect you to do your worst:

Def Jux Free Amazon Sampler!! Get It While its Free

defcon — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 16:54:28 -0400

Click Here, Cause its free!!

Chef/DJ StrESE Brews a keg of Terrorist Fist Jab Milk Stout

defcon — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 11:44:58 -0400

^{(Lead Photo by Todd Westphal)}

Many of you probably are unaware that our fantastic label manager here at Def Jux/ Founder of Embedded Records/ DJ Ese etc etc etc, is a bit of a foodie. Not only does DJ Ese leave us with great recipies and important (life saving even) cooking tips but recently he has started brewing his own beer.....

I have been busy learning to brew beer since June and this Friday, Halloween, we’re going to serve our first kegged beer, The Terrorist Fist Jab Milk Stout. This beer was the fifth batch we brewed and I really wanted to make a milk stout, in honor of my favorite Keegan Ales brew, Mother’s Milk.

Observe

The bag of specialty grains used prior to steeping...

The OG reading - 1.060

Vigorous fermentation brought to us by Six Point Craft Ales!

Gravity reading on 8/21 - 1.022

Transferring to secondary on 8/23

Here’s the recipe:

-8.5 lb Pale Liquid Extract

Specialty grains:
-1.00 lb Chocolate Malt
-0.75 lb Caramel/Crystal Malt
-0.50 lb Roasted Barley
-0.50 lb Cara-Pils/Dextrine

-2.5 oz Goldings, NZ [4.1% aau] (60 min)
-0.5 oz Goldings, NZ [4.1% aau] (40 min)
-1.0 oz Fuggle, UK [4.3% aau] (40 min)
-1.0 oz Fuggle, UK [4.3% aau] (20 min)

-1.00 lb Milk Sugar (Lactose) was added at end of boil

started with 2 gallons of water, and we steeped the specialty grains at 150F for 30 minutes before we started the boil.

Sweeping Generalizations with Blockhead: Old to the New

defcon — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 14:16:12 -0400

I was walking down the street today and I passed a group of high schoolers. My immediate reaction, because I’m a prick, was "fuck these kids..." But as I continued walking I began thinking of being young. Some guy (too lazy to look it up) once said "youth is wasted on the young" [editorial footnote - it was George Bernard Shaw]. That quote popped into my head after seeing those kids...

I thought about it and I’d say that quote is half right. Everyone always says "Man, if I knew then what I know now...". I’ve said it, probably once a day for the past 8 years, and like most grown men, I am full of regrets. Most of them have to do with pussy I should have gotten in high school, I’m pretty sure most guys can relate to that. However, there so much shit you can only do when you’re young that becomes completely unacceptable once you enter adulthood. Shit like getting retarded haircuts, wearing florescent sneakers, doing acid and eating Mcdonalds.

When you’re young, unless you royally fuck up and do some shit like kill someone, you can usually bounce back from whatever. Mistakes are par for the course. The older you get, the less mistakes you can really make. So, with that said, I just wanted to weigh the pro’s and cons of youth vs. being grown up.

SEX-

Young men have it good cause they get to have sex with teenaged girls. While, in theory, I’d love to fuck a 19 year old, I also don’t really want to. An 18 year old guy can fuck a 17 year old girl and feel no shame about it. That’s nice. On the downside, most young girls are too insecure, too inexperienced, or have seen to much weird porn to be fun to have sex with.

On the guy side, sorry ladies, but you’re fucking an 18 year old boy. You’re lucky if he doesn’t bust a nut from touching his dick when he pees, let alone putting it in your vagina. Not to mention, an 18 year old boy's finger banging skills probably resemble Winnie the Pooh violently digging his paw in the honey pot. So, unfortunately, the older and more unattractive we get, the better we get at sex. It’s as if the lower your balls hang, the more skills you’ve attained.

Irony is awesome like that.

DRUGS-

I know I've covered drugs before so bear with me if this is at all repetitive.

When you’re young, you don’t have perspective. When I was a kid, I looked at stoned people as risk takers. People who smoked weed were edgy. As I got older, and people started doing harder drugs, that was even edgier. The first time I saw someone do coke I was in high school and I remember thinking "Holy shit, people my age do that?that’s so crazy!" It was when I smoked weed that it was all demystified.

Years later I see someone who smokes mad weed as kinda bummy and I look at cokeheads as the least edgy people on the planet. But if you’re young, you might as well get it out of the way then. No one should start doing drugs once they have a career going and if you do ecstasy with any regularity after the age of 25, you truly need to check yourself...into the douche hospital.

The kind of drugs that really do separate the ages are hallucinogens. That’s the youth drug of all time cause it’s the kinda shit that actually can mold a person. For better or worse, when you’re young and have no real worries beyond family and friends, you can do some shrooms and just bug out. Once you become an adult and have some shit on your plate, forget about it. It’s hard enough to jerk off and not think of paying taxes let alone taking some acid and not totally going insane.

I've had amazing times on mushrooms. While I don't recommend them, I'm also not about to tell a 19 year old to not do it. fuck'em..they aren't my kids! But, on a darker note, I have a family member who took way too much liquid acid once. He tripped for 30 hours, ended up pissing on his chest cause he was laying down naked with with a hard on and then he tried to bone his own mom. So, you know, be careful.

EATING-

I remember being able to eat a #2 meal at Mcdonalds and then immediately play a two hour game of basketball afterwards. If I did that now, I’d shit in my pants on the way to the court. Young people have iron stomachs. From junk food to drinking, they can handle it. When you get older, all of a sudden all these weird stomach afflictions materialize. Food allergies and shit, that was never a problem before, start to take over. Not to mention, health wise, your diet HAS to change.

Ideally, I’d like eat some form of fried food with mayo and/or cheese on it for every meal but if I did that I doubt I'd ever get off the toilet again.. Once you reach a certain age, you begin to monitor your meals. That tub of ice cream you used to be able to put away after smoking a blunt is a thing of the past. Unless, of course, you don’t mind being a totally fat piece of shit. If that’s not an issue, then I suppose there is no difference between eating when you’re young and when you’re old.

Except for the seizures and heart attacks.

KNOWLEDGE-

Of course, everyone thinks they know everything at all times. From 15 to 50, there’s rarely a moment when anyone thinks they’re not the smartest person in the world. As you get older, you definitely do get smarter and you learn more and more about human nature and why people act they way they do. When I was 15, I knew everything. Then, when I was 20, I looked back on how little I knew when I was 15 and that never ends...But the funny thing is when you, as a 30 year old, come across a 21 year old who is bright eyed and full of opinions and ideas - that person hasn’t been broken down by the reality of life yet and they still have that taking the bull by the horns mentality - I’d like to say it’s cute but it’s more just naive. It is also pretty standard...as I’ve said before, it’s all about perspective. nothing gives you that like the passing of time.

With that said, you can’t dismiss that some people, no matter what age, will always be idiots or assholes. I’d like to say people grow out of that but if you’re a 22 year old total dickface, it’s pretty much ingrained in you to be like that forever. Unless people did some sort of dickface intervention...that’d be nice. Oh and bear in mind, I will most likely read this in a few years and blush at how stupid I was...

So, really, some parts of youth are wasted on the young. Soft skin, firm boobs, great hair and all other things related to your physical appearance. That’s wasted cause, a lot of the time, they don’t know what they have. But the drugs, iron stomach and awkward sex? They can have that. The good thing about youth is everyone goes through it so, unless you’re a child actor, it skips no one. We all get our chance to fuck up and rebuild or not fuck up and have regrets.

So, next time you’re out and see a 22 year old having fun, shit faced while making out with some hot person, with no worries in the world, remember, those are best days of his/her life and you’ve done that already.

And if you haven’t? don’t worry...that’s what hookers are for.

A Special Tuesday Edition of Sweeping Generalizations with Blockhead: For the Ladies...

defcon — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 09:20:41 -0400

How to Maintain your Booty Call without Driving the Guy Away in Fear....

Some guy wrote a book called He's Just Not that into You. I never read it but from what I know, the guy who wrote it was a writer on Sex in the City so I'm gonna assume it's a worthless piece of shit. Without actually reading it, I've gathered the book is about how women often misconstrue a man's intentions when they first start hooking up (or "dating" for all for all you old timey motherfuckers). I recently had two separate conversations about this very topic;

One was with a friend of mine who recently hooked up with a girl and she immediately wouldn't leave him alone. The other was with a girl who is single and hates when guys assume every girl they meet wants to be their girlfriend. Obviously, I'm a man so I'm not to familiar with the ladies point of view on this. So, just to clarify for all you girls out there who simply want to just "hang out" with a guy and not get too deep, here's some rules to live by:

1) Break Out -

When you wake up in his bed, prepare to be out. Have morning sex, chit chat a little, even have breakfast. But after that, YOU MUST LEAVE. Nothing has turned me away from girls like the clingy morning after. The thing is, with guys, it's not like we hate you in the morning and we want you to get out of our faces, it's more we just wanna chill. Take a dump, watch some TV, call some friends. These are all things we'd rather do alone (at least for the time being). If you truly are not trying to be a dude's girl, then this should be of no issue to you. In fact, you should WANT to bounce. You got shit to do, right? More then once I've left my house with a girl and walked around the block just so she'd leave. Not cause I didn't like her, but cause me saying "it's time for you to go" just wouldn't fly. Overstaying your welcome is a speedy way to dissed-ville.

2) Crossing the Boundaries -

When two people are in a leisurely booty call type of relationship, there are certain invisible lines drawn. One is to not see each other more then once a week, MAYBE twice if you're both at the same place twice and you both feel like boning. One of the kisses of death is the unwanted phone call. I've had perfectly good booty call type relationships flushed away when I felt a boundary was crossed. A daytime phone call? Not the move. Asking to hang out the day after we just hung out? Bad move. Both of those things make men feel like you want more then just sex. Even if you're literally calling the next day saying "I just wanna have sex", we don't read it like that. We see that as you wanting this to progress farther then we're willing to take it. It's an early warning flag. I'd advise you ladies to really get into texting, it's way more casual and less threatening to our sensitive male minds.

3) Sex is Just Sex -

One of the main (and unfortunate) differences between men and women is a guy can have sex with one girl tons of times and not catch feelings, I mean for YEARS. While girls can have casual sex just like anyone else, I've yet to come across a girl who wants to be the lifetime booty call.

Understandably so, but still, it's a big difference. I realize this is a well known thing but I feel like girls forget it. Just cause a guy wants to sleep with you, does not mean anything more than that. He might like your ass or be coming out of a draught or drunk. I'm not saying girls don't sleep with random dudes all the time but you can rest assured the majority of those random dudes are not pining over the girl the next day. They might try and bone again but the connection ends there (at least for the time being).

4) Slow Down -

What's with all this quick falling in love bullshit? Men and women do it. How the fuck can anyone feel that strongly about another person in such a short period of time? I suppose some people are just looking for it. But if you ever hook up with someone you don't know particularly well and they are all of a sudden acting like they love you, break out and dead it as soon as possible. It's for the betterment of both of you.

5) PDA -

Drunkenly making out happens. It's how one night stands and booty call relationships pop off in most cases. But little things like hand holding with a booty call...not the move. I'm just saying...it's a bad look. For some reason, there's a deeper intimacy that goes with hand holding. I don't know why but there just is. How do you think all those "No Sex Till Marriage" types hold out so well? Hand holding...and blow jobs with a little anal thrown in.

6) No Crying Allowed -

The biggest red flag of all is when a girl cries. It tends to happen when they're drunk and it's the emotional equivalent to barfing into a guys mouth. The second that upper lip starts to quiver and the eyes start to water, EVERY guy thinks the same thing. "fuck this bullshit...". Rules were made and agreed on. Entering into a care free relationship is like signing a pact. However, once those tears flow, all bets are off.

Maybe it's your body freaking out cause it cannot handle the situation it's being put in. That's fine. Sometimes emotions sneak up on you, especially in a tricky set up like the kind we're dealing with here. But know, your cover is blown. You're bugging and the end is near. But trust me, it's for the better. He doesn't like you enough and you can't change him. Sorry...just get back on that horse and find a new dude. It's not hard. You have a pussy. Men love those.

When it all comes down to it, just be honest with yourself and the dudes you deal with. If you seriously don't want a relationship, men will oblige. If you find your self frustrated, sad or angry at a guy, chances are, you're catching feelings and the chances are, he's not. A good way to see if a guy's intentions are true is to not fuck him. Make him wait a little. If he's really down, he'll have no issue waiting. If he's not down, he'll get bored and go fuck some other bitch.

Pretty simple math when you think about it.

Featured Merch: Bronx and Chicago Fitted Hats

defcon — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:05:43 -0400

They're Here!!

The new DJX fitted hats are in stock now, but in limited and short supply.

Get a jump on that and have your pick of the Chicago design - in black - or the Bronx- in navy blue.

Hats are 99% Polyesther and 1% Rayon.

Featured Merch: The DJX Protect T-Shirt

defcon — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 17:36:46 -0400

Its that time again, and we've got some good stuff coming to the pharmacy this fall. Introducing the 'DJX Protect' T- shirt in Blue and Yellow. Preorders ship OCTOBER 2ND!!!

Get your preorder on now and get a DJX drop card which will grant you 10 classic DJX tracks totally free!!

The Def Jux Tribute to Governor Sarah Palin

defcon — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:53:00 -0400

Here at DJX headquarters we've been accumulating many worth while reading/ viewing materials on the republican candidate for vice president, Sarah Palin. We felt in the spirit of informing the voters of America, we would share them with you...

First up, the place where Sarah Palin gained all of her 'nation building' experience...

Next, a little commentary on the close and highly professional relationship that led Senator McCain to choose Govenor Palin as his Vice Presidential runningmate...

But don't just take it from us, the politcal punditry is alll over it...

Remember kids,

(A Special Monday Presentation of..) Sweeping Generalizations with Blockhead: You are Innocent!

defcon — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 17:11:30 -0400

I was listening to that Tom Waits song 'You're Innocent When You Dream' and I thought; " If that's true, then I suppose you're also innocent when you jerk off." This really came up cause I've heard girls complain about their boyfriends jerking off. Whether it be why? to whom? or when? It seems to be an issue a lot of girls have...

For a man, jerking off is a few things: a release, a sleep aide, and a thing you do when you're bored. As devious as some of the porn some guys may watch is, it still boils down to just wanting to bust that nut and keep it moving. So, when I say someone is innocent when they do it, I mean in the sense that it's not a deep gesture. The thing about jerking off is it is all you. A person is just as guilty in thought as they are in jerking off. If you think about touching children but don't actually do it, you're not guilty of anything (except being gross). Jerking off is the same thing just a baby step further. (The obvious exception being someone actually owning child porn, which is totally illegal and fucked up.)

But I digress...in all other cases, you ARE innocent. I've heard girls get pissy cause they find out their boyfriends don't jerk off with them in mind. That's insane. That would be like day dreaming of taking a tropical vacation in your own kitchen. In fact, girls should rest easy, that is their man's way of exorcising the demons all men have when in a relationship. They still are attracted to other girls...always...it never stops. No NORMAL guy should ever feel bad for rubbing one out.

I think part of the problem is cause women and men see masturbation as two completely different things. Obviously I don't know but I imagine women can think of smells, atmosphere, little non sexual detail (as well as the sex it self). I think , if in the right mood, a woman could flick the bean to the thought of a really good chocolate bar or a pair of shoes...but I could be wrong. It's rare you meet a girl who likes watching hardcore, dick in vagina close up, pussy pounding porn the same way men do. There's a reason soft core porn exists (for women and 13 year olds who only have cinemax).

Men, on the other hand, need that basic animal stimulation. We need to see fucking. I could jerk off in a shit filled outhouse in the middle of summer if I had the right porn. No candles necessary. No music. The other difference is the ending of the act. I'mma about to put you girls on to something kinda interesting. Now, I'm not a girl so I don't know what you ladies do when you finish making love to yourself. If it's anything like what you're like after sex I imagine you're just kinda relaxed and still.
Kinda just chilling.

Us men do something different.

My friends and I call it "apple Q" based on the act of shutting down a program quickly on a mac computer. If you have one, you know what I'm talking about. If not, it's just pressing the apple button and Q at the same time so whatever program your using shuts down and vanishes immediately. I've learned that when most dudes jerk off to porn on theirs macs, we "apple Q" the second we bust a nut.

Why? cause we want nothing to do with the porn we were just watching.

It's done.

We're done.

If that doesn't shed some light on a male brain i don't know what does...

Sweeping Generalizations with Blockhead: Whatever Happened to the Prep School Gangsters?

defcon — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 16:08:57 -0400

Back when I was in high school, New York Magazine did an expose article on 'prep school gangsters'. These were all kids who went to NYC private schools and I went to school with tons of them. From uptown to downtown, they were everywhere...

(**Note to read article, Click here, scroll down to 1996 stories it is the cover article)

For the most part, they were bored rich kids who watched too much Yo! MTV Raps. During that time, I was deeply immersed in hip hop shit, I was obsessed. The whole "keeping it real" angle never really appealed to me so I stuck with just the music part. The prep school gangsters (who were rarely hard and usually retarded) were the kids who also liked rap. I'd be lying if I said it was much of a conversation piece but it was a commonality between us. As time went on, we all got older and people kinda scattered in their different directions. A thing I've noticed since maybe 1995 or so is that these prep school thugs love of "the game" was fleeting. After biggie died it seems they all just shrugged their shoulders and picked a new thing to be all about. Not to mention, it's hard to be hard when you go to Vassar or U. Penn. In the last few years, these old people from the past have popped up here and there and it always bugs me out to see them. Mostly cause it's amazing the directions these people have gone. Since I'm a fan of stereotypes, I figured it would be interesting to see all the reincarnations of the 'post prep-school gangster'...at least the ones I've noticed:

1) The Wall Street Douche

When all is said and done, this was destiny for most of these kids. Sure, they rocked crazy polo sweaters and had 4 beepers, but when the chamber doors closed the gruff accent dropped and it was tea time with mommy and daddy (and possibly a butler). Their parents had this plan for them before "Rappers Delight" was ever recorded. No amount of fucking off in college or blunts smoked would ever change this path. Like Nas' second album (that they probably kinda liked), It Was Written.

2) The Club Guy

Back in high school, there were club parties some of these dudes would throw. They were corny and full of the worst upper east side dick faces on the planet. They would play reggae, hip hop and shit like "come baby come" by k7. These dudes ruled that particular social scene with a smug grimace on their faces. But, as they got older, they didn't leave the party. Their connections didn't vanish so they went from high school club promoter to a regular club promoter. Not much of a change BUT you wouldn't recognize them if you passed them on the street. Gone were the baggy jeans and baseball hat. They were replaced with some queer eye gear and hair gel. Very persian. The funniest thing about these guys is when I run into them, they still persist with the thuggy accent even though they look like Madonna back up dancers. I figure if you're gonna let it go that hard, let it ALL go. Then again, these guys are all rich with super hot girlfriends so I can assume they could give a shit what I think>

3) The Fat Rap Guy

For some reason, they are always fat...and have goatees. These are the guys that stuck with the hip hop like their lives depended on it. Most of them were DJj's and while I applaud their dedication, it is a blind dedication. They will swear up and down that KRS one is still amazing and how DJ Premier is incapable of making a half assed beat. They are purists to the point of delusion. They are also just setting themselves up for the ultimate life lesson when they realize (sometime down the line) that hip hop isn't looking for the next 33 year old sensation...that shit will sting.

4) The Hipster

Not to be confused with club guys, these guys don't go to Marquee and buy bottles. They're more about the scene then the venue. From Girbaud to the tightest skinny jeans ever seen on a man, they've got the hair, the stubble and the tattoos. This one always bugs me out cause it's doing a complete 180. Like if they could see what they were gonna become in high school, they'd kill themselves (or maybe just gay bash themselves).

Obviously, everyone is going to change a lot from high school into adulthood and beyond...but this shit is so telling of the reality that people never really change. In the mid 90's hip hop was the hot shit. Now, it's this hipster shit (is it rock? I think so but I can't really tell...) These guys just went with what was there. There's nothing wrong with getting sick of a music style or a scene, it happens. Shit, I make hip hop for a living and the last thing I wanna do now is listen to new rap. However, there's a difference between expanding your horizons and abandoning something completely. It's depressing to run into these types and when I tell them what I do, they look at me like; "You're still into that shit? Don't you read Vice Magazine?"

My issue with these types is that they reject any connection to that scene that occupied their lives for their most formidable years. It shows that, chances are, they were never really down with it
to begin with. It was a stepping stone to the next hip thing. In 5th grade, we would call someone like that a poser and I'm willing to bet, in 5th grade, most of these guys were frantically trying to figure out where to buy the new Garbage pail Kids so they could fit in. Fucking posers...